Nia: Finding Your Purpose in the Kwanzaa Principle of Purpose

Purpose is defined as “the reason for which something exists or is done, made, used, etc.” The Nia principle is meant for people to define themselves and figure out their why. 

Purpose in Your Life

The easiest and hardest thing for people to recognize in covenant marriage is that it’s not about them. The purpose of marriage is for it to be an earthly representation of the marriage between Christ and His bride, the Church. All of the things that He sacrificed for her are the same things that we’re to sacrifice for our spouse. If you marry with anything other than a servant’s heart and an agape outlook, you’re relationship is starting out on unstable foundations…

I’m about to enter decade #4 and just recently realized my purpose in life. One of my favorite books is The Purpose Driven Life. I read and worked through it when I was in college, but 20 years later, I think I’m going to read it again. As we grow up, we’re supposed to change…for the better. We’re supposed to grow, make progress, and help those behind us. We’re not here to just occupy space. We all have a reason for being and our lives…and the lives of those around us…are made better when we realize it and live in it.

Purpose in Your Marriage

When I got married, I had a much clearer idea of the goals in my marriage. I got married with the idea that life was going to be beautiful. I finally had a man, I was going to have 4 children, and a great career that I loved; my husband was going to provide for all of our needs and make his way up the corporate ladder. We would have a big house and life would be roses and sunshine. I love roses.

Also, I was wrong.

Six years into this amazing marriage, I’m childless, working part-time from home, living on less than half the income we enjoyed for the first 4 years of marriage. Our house is old, I’m getting fatter…and finding more gray hairs everyday.

But I’m not wrong when I say that I have a beautiful life.

Another favorite book is A Woman of Strength and Purpose. This book helped me to refocus my will and desires to what would best serve those around me, specifically my husband and our family. The only thing we can know for sure is that life is going to have plot twists. The manuscript is going to go off the rails sometimes. No matter those changes, your purpose in covenant marriage is still the same. You are to love and serve your spouse with an agape heart because that will allow you to live in a marriage that is reflective of the relationship that exists between Christ and the Church. Too many times, the only Jesus that people will see is you…and how you interact with your spouse.

Serving is Your First Purpose

As Christians, our mission is to serve others. As Christian wives, it is to serve Jesus and our husband. It may not necessarily be on your hands and knees in the dirt, but we are to serve others. Galatians 5:13 reminds us “You, my brothers and sisters, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh ; rather, serve one another humbly in love.”

• Responsibility: love your spouse, as Christ loved us {1 John 3:16-18}
• Burden: forgive your spouse, as He forgives us {Colossians 3:13}
• Gift: give grace, as you’ve been given it {1 Peter 4:8}
• Task: help and support your spouse, in agape love {Galatians 6:2}

How do you do those things? You have to find it within the gifts you’ve been given in this life. Fortunately for me, one of my gifts is that of talking, and I have the privilege to serve you through this ministry. As we prepare to go into the new year, I pray that you discover your purpose and live it out in love.