This post is a little two-sided for me to write. I’ve long said that if I could redo anything in my life, that I wouldn’t because all of my decisions made me the woman I am today. I don’t say that I don’t have regrets. I don’t pretend that I always made the wisest of decisions. But the question is this…If you could redo one moment in your life, what would it be and why? How would it change who you are now? Mine is simple enough…I’d burn a bridge a little faster than I did.
A bridge to nowhere…
I was always told that you should never burn bridges. I didn’t really know what that meant or why people said it, but I’ve grown to know that there is a bit of truth in the saying + that it’s entirely situational. Burning bridges is defined as:
1) The act of unpleasantly and permanently ending relations with another person, or an organization. This could happen one day. The older that I get, the more I want to say what I’m really thinking.
2) To act harshly/disgracefully upon leaving a situation to ensure that you will not be welcomed back. I don’t think I’d be disgraceful, but there is a situation in particular where it’s possible that I will not be welcomed back. Mostly because I’m a self-proclaimed trouble maker. *shrugs*
3) To cut off the way upon which you came from, making it impossible to return or retreat. I’ve failed at this. Often.
Let’s go with point #3.
There was one particular relationship where I didn’t quite burn the bridge. I made it very easy to return to him + the “situation.” And boy, did I keep walking across that bridge! I thought that if I kept it open that I could actually make things work out. Instead, it just gave me more stuff to talk about with my therapist. Is there a verse for this? Of course there is! Matt 5:37a says But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ ” Pretty much all of my relationships involved a plethora of “maybe.”
If there is anything that I could change in my life, I would burn a bridge or 3. I would walk away from relationships that I knew were not good for me + I would have cut my losses. I’m at a point in my life where I have actually found the courage to burn a bridge when I need to, recognizing that it’s for my own mental health + sanity that I walk away from certain people/situations.
How would that burned bridge change who you are now?
I {finally} love who I am. I love who I’m becoming. I think that by burning that bridge {and many others} when I did, I would have been on a different life trajectory. I would have been much more confident in who I am today. I wouldn’t have had so much heartbreak. I wouldn’t have so many stories or testimonies to share with you.
This ministry probably wouldn’t exist.
It’s funny how everything in your life does happen for a reason. We often never see what the reason is in the midst of our trial. It’s long been my stance that the things that happen to us aren’t necessarily for us. Yes, we endure the hard time, but these difficulties in life are very often there to help to grow us + to help us to help someone else. If I’d done things differently, my life + the lives of those around me would be different as well. It would be selfish of me to actually go back and change things, so I will keep my burdens + find the joy in who I am today.
I’m curious to know…If you could redo one moment in your life, what would it be and why? How would it change who you are now? Let me know in the comments below!
I spent 11 years with someone that I should have let go so long ago. My problem is I see the best in people and what or who they become. I should have let go, but I probably wouldn’t have my two additional children(maybe or not). I would have taken the time to work on me and who I am. I would have just taken my oldest son and be happy without letting someone who I thought really cared about me was more about them and what I can help them build. My life would be different because I would never have stopped my education or taken jobs that I make less money because I wanted him to feel like the man. I would of got my stuff together. But the lesson’s that I have learned has put me in a way better position when it comes to relationships.
As hard as it is to admit, I believe that things do indeed happen for a reason, even if it’s painful. It’s all worth it if we learn what we are meant to and grow from it <3
Oh my goodness! Totally agree! I now burn bridges and I’m inspired to do so in a few more cases I’ve been waffling on. No fear, just head in the right direction and don’t look back at those burning bridges behind you!
Need matches? LOL It’s one of the hardest things to face but for your own health and sanity, go! Be blessed <3